I have been buying dog toys for the mad kitten for years now  – granted, she likes the little treatballs and mice but every so often she wants something big to wrestle with and finally, some cat toy designer got it right and made this obnoxiously large, zebra print, catnip filled and fluffy tailed ‘thing’ and she is in 7th heaven with it. To the point that she brought it to bed. She hasn’t done that since I got her that weird walmart toy about three years ago except that one she slept on for three days.

I have walked and walked and walked today. I have walked myself away from Pandora so to speak. Leaving the headphones at home. I wound up going to a cafe to start practicing using the Internet there, rather then at home and instead of getting on line (which I did for about 15 minutes to help someone find something) I wound up writing a letter for about an hour. I would have worked on the city but the intensely annoying fusion jazz station was playing just loudly enough that no one could really concentrate.

I have discovered that the secret to using the Internet in cafes is to find the places that offer wifi but do not advertise it.

When people ask me why I am removing it from my house I say “I am tired of living with all the little people in the box.” Funny how easily you can get sucked into hours of whiling away time and thinking you are doing something when you really aren’t at all doing what needs to be done.

There has been a shift again in the past few weeks, away from what was and toward what will be. Hard to explain. But it is funny, I am coming up on writing the part of the city between War and the Ocean that in a way encapsulates a lot of my thinking about problems with intimacy, relationships and friendships. One of the things we talked about in the writer’s group is the way I have set up what is going to happen (using the man made from forgotten memories) it is going to be an absolute tight rope walk between creating something sublime and beautiful, or creating something that is just a “really interesting idea.”

The sky keeps sending down hints of snow.

The mad kitten is so smart she is confused. I finally added another small heater because I am satisfied with all the insulation and now the cave is toasty. She, however, has learned to equate a certain interior temperature with a certain outside one and thinks that if it is warm inside then she can also go outside. So she hangs from the doorway looking at me with great “how could you eyes.”

I have two days to produce two second drafts for the next round of articles for street sights.

I just tore apart the executioner’s song video again and am trying a new tact. I swear, some day it will be done. It’s just not right yet. I can’t decide whether the music should come first or if it works better to shoot the whole video and then score it after.

c.2010 Cassandra Tribe. All Rights Reserved.


About cassandratribe

"There are few artists that can do what Cassandra Tribe does. Whether with her poetry, her videos or her blog, Cassandra examines the truths that most of us can never come close to realizing and shows it for what it is, both beautiful and frightening at the same time. She exposes our inner-most workings like the cross-section of a powerful but flawed machine, our gears and springs, nuts and bolts removed and laid out before us. She is a true artist. Her new video, Requiem for a God, is the latest example of Cassandra's willingness to tear open and examine the very things that make us human. Shooting the film entirely by herself, she also eliminates all the little excuses we come up with to keep us from ourselves and our truth. You see, even when she's not trying to be, Cassandra Tribe is a beacon of truth and humanity in this darkest of worlds." (Michael E. Quigg, The Culture Network, June 2009)
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