Every so often you have to admit what is wrong and how it effects you.
This…I have found…is a fact of life. Without doing this you cancling to “I am okay, I can handle this” to the point that you missopportunities to change what you are doing.
Every so often I am in the habit of defining a span of time and lettingmyself just plunge into the depths of my stress, frustration andverging depression about whatever may be the circumstances in my life.It is not pretty, but it is pretty necessary.
One of the common mistakes people make when someone is tired, upset andoverwhelmed is we don’t leave them any room to be that way. Most peoplehave a very valid reason to plunge into the occasional “woe is me theworld is ending.” Just listening to someone in those moments can oftenserve to support them in rallying to go on more so then offering amillion quick solutions or a parade of statements that generallyconsist of “its not so bad.”
In that moment it is. In that moment, there is a culmination offrustration that simply needs to be heard, not fixed. I have found thata large root at the basis of the frustration and depression tree is thebelief that you are alone, not acknowledged and your life is trivial.
Sometimes things are as bad as they seem. It is learning to stand inthat reality that lets one begin to see different choices for how toget out.
So I moped yesterday. Moped and was miserable and yet still got workdone. I also resurrected the habit of mindfulness and when my brainwent spiralling down into the dumps, I shut it off and sought relief byjust breathing and noticing what was around me. Someone gifted me witha small lamp with crystal beads hanging off it and I swear just lookingat it and observing how the light is reflected in the beads has donemore therapeutic good for me then any sit and chat sessions withsomeone I have paid.
In the end though, there has to be a time limit because you cannot stayin your sh*t. You have to make the decision to get up and go do. It iseasier to pull it all back together if you know that next sunday, youget a few hours to wallow. Weird how that works.
But life can be very trying and very tough sometimes. That is areality. Denying that reality invalidates a tremendous part of youremotional and energetic experience. One must leave room to recognize itand allow it to become part of the solution. The “this too shall pass”cr*p leaves out the other half of the sentence – “only if you figureout what to do.”
Back on track, here is some more Chesterton.
What is Wrong with the World
by G.K. Chesterton (as read by Cassandra Tribe)
available in the public domain
Part 3: Feminism or, the Mistake About Women
c.2010 Cassandra Tribe. All Rights Reserved.